PRETTYGIRL1122

SparkPoints
 

Surgery in 2 days; nervous wreck

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

My surgery is in two days and I'm going crazy! If I think about it to much I start freaking out, for the past two weeks I've pretty much cried myself to sleep every night. It's stressing me out and keeping me from my goals, ever since I found out I needed the surgery I've been eatting like crazy. I also stopped taking the diet pills (perscription) that helped me lose the 40 lbs I've lost so far. So the stress in combination with that I've gained 4 lbs in the past two weeks. I need to get back in control but it's rough, maybe I'm just meant to be the fat girl, maybe my body likes me like that...
Ok ok I should snap outta it right. Friday (if I feel up to it) I'm going to go back to my doctor and get a refill on my diet pill perscription. I don't want to be dependent on them, but they motivate me so much. They could be fake sugar pills for all I know, but they give me confidence and make me want to exersice hard core and do good. I need that boost, at least right now.
I'm so lonely right now, me and my boyfriend broke up because I didn't tell him I was having surgery, and the stress of it all made me kinda distant (his words). I didn't know exactly that it would come down to that, I've known I might need it for like a year now, but just found out 2 weeks ago it was for sure. And I never told him, or anyone, what I was going through till very recently. I'm so lonely and mad, mad at him for leaving me when I need someone the most, but more mad at me cuz I feel like it's my fault and could of been avoided. Why can't I ever get a break.

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RHALES199
    take care & I will pray that the surgery & recovery goes well emoticon emoticon
    4233 days ago
  • LEXEY626
    It's understandable that you've eaten a little too much these past two weeks during this extremely stressful time, but you will get back on track. Our bodies respond to change, so when you go back to eating healthy, you will lose those extra pounds you gained quickly.

    My thoughts are with you for your surgery; if you feel you need to talk to someone about it, feel free to pm me. You shouldn't feel alone right now, you need that extra support from those who care about you.

    emoticon

    Lexie
    4233 days ago
  • no profile photo CD5190246
    Thinking of you ...
    The lead up to surgery can be scary ... no matter how big or small the procedure
    Sorry to hear about the boyfriend ... that has to be hard

    Stay focused on you ...
    Try to find your happy place ...

    We're here for you at SP.

    Keep us informed.
    4234 days ago
  • DRAGONFLY1974
    Sending you big hugs! I know you need them right now! Good luck with the surgery, they usually aren't as bad as you dread. I've had 6 and you'd think by now I'd stop freaking myself out, but I still do it!
    4234 days ago
  • JAZZYJUDE
    Hi sweetie - not sure what kind of surgery you are having but I wish you the best. Don't stress over something you can't control. Go with the flow and let it be and THEN make the most of it.

    Try to see the positive of this surgery you are having, not the negative. Turn this experience with your boyfriends a 'lesson to learn' and them move forward for yourself. YOU are the only one you have to be answerable to and if there are things you need to do, then so be it.

    What it comes down to...is you know who your friends are when you are in need. Come here os SP, we can help you ease your way so you can focus on your dreams with a smile...
    emoticon Jazzy!!
    4234 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

More Blogs by PRETTYGIRL1122