SparkPoints

Feeling down & lonley

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Im feeling lonely and out of sorts i usually get motivated after reading stories from here "and still do" but i read some of the stories how people are so grateful for friends and then i realize i have none. I have not one single girlfriend i can call just to discuss what im thinking,what im doing, i have made my hubby & kids my entire life and i miss having other women just to chat with its very hard to explain how this got this way but i have realized more so now than ever before IM LONELY! Id love to call up a friend and discuss the great things im learning here on SP maybe take my mind off my cravings we could go for a walk or something. How do i get out of this awful way ive made my life? Im in my 50's i have a lot of years ahead of me to be alone. Hohum! Shower & bed sleep always takes my thoughts away and tommorrow is another day.
Sleep well all my online friends

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FACELESSJANE
I can totally understand where you're coming from. It really is a sad and lonely place. I think many women make their family's their entire lives. I'm not going to say that's wrong, it's just what we do (as women, mothers, wives).

I find as I've gotten older, our society isn't always conducive to meeting new people. We need to create our own opportunities to meet new folks. There are plenty of good suggestions here on how to get out into the community and join some groups, a class, volunteer. I'd also like to suggest that if your community offers any free womens services, take a look at what type of classes or groups they offer. We have a womens center in our area that offers assertiveness classes (I find many women that have stayed home to raise families and have lost a lot of friends, etc. also tend to not be very assertive (me included!) and this can hinder your ability to be "out there" finding and making new friends.

But most of all, go out there and have FUN no matter what you do! People are drawn to other people that are smiling, having a good time and fulfilling their own needs. Make your own needs your priority and do things that make you happy....because that happiness will shine through you from the inside out. I can't stay away from someone who's soul shines. It's contagious and I want to be around them. :)

Hope is not lost. Put yourself out there, have fun and you'll make some new friends. If not, this blog posting should show you that your online community is here to support you as best as we can! :)

Carina
4175 days ago
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LLCURTS
I am with you here - it depends on our interests. Mine has always been my family - then my church became my family - - - we have moved and go to a very large church - harder to have close friends in a large church - so we have never made any. I am a bit of an introvert so I don't make friends easily...

So I have work and friends hundreds of miles away. With SP you have that communication but not hangin' out time. Lots of good suggestions on other comments - just gotta get involved anywhere with people, the gym, book club, volunteer, etc, ...

It is not easy for some (me) to get out and meet new people but hey where are you from - maybe there is a fellow Sparker you could meet up and have some common ground... maybe

Linda
4204 days ago
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FT4EVR
Hi, You know I posted a comment recently about how lonely I felt on a website full of people. So please know that you are not alone.

4204 days ago
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JULESPLAN
I hear you (see my 8/21 blog)! I consider myself a pretty fun, easy to get along with person and yet, I find that I have no real friends. How I got here, I have no idea - well that's not entirely true, I have a low tolerance for BS and there's A LOT of BS out there these days............ However - I am not giving up! I've begun reaching out to strangers via MySpace (I'm a stay at home mom, so I don't meet people during a typical day). I've made a few good connections - though no one "locally", but I know there's a friend out there with my name on 'em and I AM GOING TO FIND HER - just like I'm going to loose these saddle bags! Today is a new day, filled with infinite possibilities!
4204 days ago

Comment edited on: 8/23/2009 11:37:55 AM
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KRDRAPES
Sorry to hear you are feeling lonely-if you like to read, see if there are book club with discussions at the library or a book store. I have meet many people doing things at our church, go to local school and see what help you can give there-always be open to everyone you meet for you don't know what you can be missing with their friendship. Good luck in your search-be a friend to all and you will have your friends be there for you! I turned 60 this year-let's be online friends!
4204 days ago
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L-OSTER8
One terrific way to meet new ladies is to VOLUNTEER at a hospital once or twice a week for say 4 hours each time . . . I did that for 6 1/2 years . . . and met many lovely ladies!
4204 days ago
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CRANBYRRE
Aw, I'm sorry your feeling lonely! I do too, loto times. And for the same reasons, I made my kids my whole life...don't even have my husband anymore since he died 2 yrs ago. Now I'm thinking when I move to Seattle I'm going to make some friends..lady friends to chat with and get together with sometimes. I hate not having friends! And I use to have so many when I was (a lot) younger..

What I'm gonna do is join some groups, gonna be a groupie lol! Join an aerobics class, take a evening class or two, stuff like that. It's one of my big goals to make some girl friends to hang around with once or twice a week (get together for lunch, exercise together, maybe chat on the phone like you said...)

What are you going to do about it? (wish we lived closer, maybe we could get together..). Anywayz good luck!
4205 days ago

Comment edited on: 8/23/2009 1:16:03 AM