PAULA_W_D

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Being Nicer To Me

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

One of the teams I belong to is having a challenge for December. It's the Nothing To Lose Holiday Challenge. We have a couple of really awesome team leaders who come up with some great daily challenges and personal reflection opportunities.

Today's question was What Will You Do Differently In 2010?

The Jules1, one of my wise team mates, replied "I am going to be nicer to myself. I am my own worse critic"

That really sparked something in me. I am very hard on myself. I use internal language to scold and ridicule myself that I would never use on someone else. For instance, last night I went to bed and after I got comfortable I realized I'd left my reading glasses in the other room. I said to myself, Paula, you idiot, how hard is it to remember your glasses. Not only would I never say that to someone else, I'd never even think it.

Terry Hefter, a licensed psychotherapist says in an article on her website:

"No matter what the reason overly-critical parents can cause almost irreparable harm to a child's self-image and feelings of self-worth. It is destructive because children's reference-points for self-worth are the people closest to them --- especially their parent figures."

There is no one closer to me than me. What irreparable harm am I doing to my self-image and feelings of self-worth if I talk to myself like that all the time?

I've been talking to myself like this for a very long time. It's going to be very difficult to change, but I'm going to try.

Thank you Jules for opening my eyes.

http://www.hefter.com/a_crit
ical.asp
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • STILLPOINT
    Hi There,

    Wonderful! I think the best weight loss tool we can have is to love ourselves. Love ourselves enough to take the time and make the effort to reach our goals.

    Blessings,
    Mer

    emoticon
    3880 days ago
  • JULES225
    Thanks for writing this. I needed to hear it today.
    3902 days ago
  • WALNUT5612
    Good blog!
    3902 days ago
  • MINDYJ1
    I know I'm my own worst critic! No one gives me a hard time than me! We all need to start being nicer to ourselves! We can do it! emoticon Mindy
    3902 days ago
  • TEXASDEEVA
    It is true. We are most often our own worst critic and even enemy. I most often diminish my shine so as not to intimidate others, but I believe that I am the most loving, compassionate person anyone would want for a friend. I love me with a healthy balance and therefore I can love others.

    Don't be too hard on yourself and yes it will take time. I'm praying for you.

    love TexasDeeva
    3902 days ago
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