This, Too, Shall Pass

Sunday, February 28, 2010

So, a setback in mood gave me pause for concern a couple of days ago...
That's it. Pause.
In 24 hours time I was back on track. No obsessing: 'OMG, the depression is back.... Here it comes'. No throwing caution to the wind, no self-sabotage, no emotion-driven food binges. Nothing. Just the unfamiliar odd looming knowledge somewhere in my brain that while, yes, I was quite down, that "this too shall pass".

I think this is the closest I've ever been to comprehending how (so-called) normal folks experience and process "the blues". I'd see people my whole life who had low moments or days, but unlike me, theirs seemed to occur in small frames of time, transitory in nature and, unlike me, they seemed to know even WHILE the sadness was there that in a day or two they'd be OK. I always felt like mine would never leave, and even worse, when I'd do well for a week, month or even several months there was always the underlying fear (almost terror sometimes) of the depression returning.

Could it be that I've won my lifelong battle with depression?

It may be too soon to tell, but for now I am just enjoying this feeling of control over my own extremes of emotion. Among so many other things.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • VICD25
    WTG! One slip does not have to become a binge. Hope this is the start to years of healthy living!

    4064 days ago
    Thanks for popping around and your comments. You should read my earlier blogs it will lift your spirits. " the pink dress and making pancakes" Remember behind every dark cloud there is a silver lining. Don't mope it brings on wrinkles, Smile it will show up your dimples and it will brighten up the person you are looking at's life.
    4070 days ago
    Good job! I used to be like you describe. I pulled myself up and tried to move away from that after I had my daughter! Good luck on your quest!
    4071 days ago
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