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2013 I hope it is a year of change.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

I have used this space for many things. I have written about my hopes to lose weight and my failures.

I have shared many things I know. I have shared my triumphs and some of my failures. I have shared things I have learned and a few moments that I am sure everyone else got and I am the last one to figure out.

I started this journey a few years ago when I realized I had not lost enough weight since my son's birth. I wanted to lose 1/2 of what I weighed on that day. My net lose since that time is "only" 25 pounds. It has been a few years.

Over the past few days I have written some stuff for myself on paper that I do not intend to share. . I have thought about the good choices, the bad choices and even some ugly things about myself.

Here I sit another year with not much change in my weight. I was down about 30 pounds less than I am right now. I did feel better. I then got on insulin and have used that as an excuse to struggle.

I start the day strong then I find excuses not to succeed. it is time to succeed. It is time to embrace the journey.

Today I have been thinking about some of the things my kids have said to me. These sons are over 20. Some of the things that make me cringe the most I react strongly to because they ring true.

Today I read Coach Nancy's blog about self compassion. I have no idea how to do this. I have been feeling sorry for myself these last few weeks. Giving myself extra sleep and days that I don't stress about what I have to do are not seeming to help. i am trying to figure out what I really want. What will make me feel successful.? How can I accept less than perfection and be happy with myself? Expecting perfection is clearly not working.

I am know I need to change something. I need to reduce the list of IF ONLYs. I need a list of good things that I know that I could accomplish most days.

I know I feel better when:
1. I do not eat sugar.
2. I eat balanced and regular meals.
3. I drink water regularly.
4. I do basic chores daily. (even better is when my family helps.)
5. I spend some time doing fun things like reading but when I balance it with the things that NEED to get done.
6. I spend some time doing creative things.
7. I spend some time feeding my spiritual side.

I keep writing about these things. I need to figure out how to set up my world so more of these things happen more often. I hope that if I do this I will feel successful. When I feel like I am successful I work harder to be successful.

So this year I promise to ask myself before I make a choice if it will make me feel successful. I will usually make the better choice. This is the year of change.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I saved Coach Nancy's self compassion article...but haven't read it yet. I am doing that right after i post this message. :)
    I am not a negative person...except when it comes to myself. This year I vow to change that...and learn to love myself.
    In order to make it through life...we first must take care of ourselves.
    I love what you wrote and think we are on the right path.
    2826 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4274730
    I've found that cutting out caffeine completely has really helped my bouts of depression (negative self-talk and such). I also visited a naturopath who now has me on thyroid supplements and vitamin D in addiction to other meds for fertility. She's also had me on an anti-inflammatory diet. I have to say, since cutting out caffeine, starting the anti-inflammatory diet and getting on thyroid meds, I feel like a brand-new person.

    Bottom line is this: for a long time, I thought it was just me...now I know that isn't so true. I think you a fantastic plan for 2013 :)
    2828 days ago
  • TEDYBEAR2838
    Good blog! Thank you.

    it is time to succeed. It is time to embrace the journey.
    {So well put}
    2828 days ago
    I learned a phrase from Sandra Ahten (a weight loss podcaster/coach with a free podcast called 'The Reasonable Diet'). She said that we can choose to feel virtuous when we do the right thing instead of deprived. That really resonated with me, it might help you when you are trying to make the right choice.
    2829 days ago
  • NANCY-
    Every year is a year of change.

    Sweetie, I totally understand where you are coming from. Giving to others, but you need to give to yourself too. Not work stuff, but some fun stuff.

    I paint my toes and have lovely color to look at when working out. It is silly that something so small and trivial brightens my spirit. Find something fun, frivolous that makes you smile. I was surprised for me it was a simple bottle of nail polish. Occasionally I really splurge and have a pedicure.

    Taking the time out for you because you are so worth it. Doing the fun stuff helps me to renew my energy and move forward with my challenges. If things do not work out, keep looking you will find what works for you.

    “I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.”
    ― Thomas A. Edison

    Look what happened to Edison, he keep moving forward, and I know you will too.
    Here's to a wonderful New Year!

    2829 days ago
    I am with you. When I make bad choices I feel badly about myself, my character, my weakness. I know what to do but execution is tough for me. I DO find that it is easier for me to get things done during the day if I give myself "rules": no computer time until I clean the bathroom; no reading until after I make those phone calls, etc.

    I think you should start changing your self-talk to more positive messages, like "2013 IS the year of change". When we "hope" we leave it up to fate, chance, or outside influences!!

    2829 days ago
  • CAT125
    I love this saying.
    "If you're tired of starting over, stop giving up! Bad choices make me start over, so I learn from it and make a better choice the next day!
    emoticon emoticon
    2829 days ago
  • MACMOM57
    2829 days ago
    Great idea!
    2829 days ago
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