Hello to all my friends - I hope in my absence that things have been well for you and that you are blessed with more good days than bad. I am temporarily camerless, so the picture above is from June, but I think I look even better now... I finally got the time and the Bipolar Roller Coaster in my head to focus long enough to ask for thoughts on recent traumatic encounter with some of important people in my life.
I went to visit them last Monday, first time in months. I told them how richly blessed I was that God has never turned his back for me, and has always provided exactly what I need at the very last moment. Between an unexpected check and my roommate getting 6 weeks of full time paid training for his new job things look like we're going to get caught up on bills for first time this year.
Next thing I know is that both of them are harrassing me about not having a job to supplement my disability income (they have mentioned this before but not this judgementally). Then I get blasted about how much medication I am on now - and likely will be for the rest of my life. One said to me "I feel sorry for you" taking so many medications and vitamins (which they don't even know one name of).
Needless to say these two people are the same ones who helped lead me back to my Lutheran upgringing and my life here at the Church, and this past weekend's sermon was about forgiveness. The thing that bothers me the most I think - is that they went swung from being proud of all my weight loss and physical & mental transformation - to pitying me in one 15 minute conversation.
People who suffer from multiple mental disorders and dealing with their bodies readjusting to a new hormones, vitamins metabolism and lifestyle have NO IDEA WHAT IT FEELS LIKE, unless they have some or all of the same disorders etc. Sure I would like to go work part time somewhere, but for now, I am getting used to moving around and being out of the house for extended periods of time while my roommate of 12 years is working again.
So I am going to forgive and when the time is right, try to let them understand how BiPolar, Depressed, ADHD, and Impulsive Outburst Control Disorders affect my ability to function on a consistent daily basis - just living.
This is kind of unusual for me to just vent, and thank you for taking the time to read and hopefully respond with your thoughts on the matter and to just say hi. Have a Blessed weekend -
Your friend, "Sprink"
p.s. does anyone have the Fitbit Arm-band/Bracelet or other Fitbit models and how do you like them? Thanks - S