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Saturday, October 12, 2019

We are one week away from Brad's new regiment of treatment. Am I scared to death about it, you are damn right! But his faith and strong attitude really impresses me. Below is his latest blog. A little shorter than most, but I think you can see why I am so proud of this young man. I am going to be so lost, as Margaret is going to be at their house next weekend watching the kids, and I will be home with the dogs. But he knows my prayers and thoughts will be on him and him alone. The day of his surgery, I think I will take off as I don't know how well I will be able to concentrate on work, But it might be what I need to do to say busy and not dwell on the surgery. Anyway, below is his latest blog. I had to dry my eyes and compose myself to write this.

“Fear does not stop death, it stops life”

I may have another caringbridge update before my surgery but just in case I do not, this is what I have on my mind. The above words speak to my motto for the past year since I was diagnosed with Stage IV rectal cancer. It absolutely sucks, it’s not fair at all, but I can’t change it. The mental gymnastics I’ve been through are hard to describe as everyone that knows me just sees this person beaming with positivity as that’s just who I am and that will never change! What you don’t see is a man that is real, that knows he is staring cancer / death in the face each and every day and saying try me, you don’t have me and never will have me. I hate statistics, I say screw them, they don’t apply to me or know my will power, but this surgery I have coming up on October 22nd is the game changer against my cancer. If this HAI pump can be implanted in me and does it’s job and I get to successful liver resection, my 5 year survival goes from something in the range of 14-25% to 70% plus. I just want this week to fly by so I can enter this next stage of my treatment as I’m ready to take this fight to the next level. I will say it again, try me cancer, I can and I will take you down! #DadBradStrong #BradsBrigade

This will be a very long week ahead. I will try and take the time to blog the next couple of weeks. I know that I haven't writing much as I am not really to sure of what to say. My thoughts are all over the place, as are my emotions.
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