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long story gets longer - younger son and high school

Friday, December 13, 2019

Back on Oct. 30 my son had his science teacher ask him what was in his hair and he realized it must be lent from his hoodie as he'd put it up when outside to go to his class in the portables because it was raining. The teacher then said 'Don't you wash?' and the class laughed and made fun of him. My son was upset and embarrassed. He left the classroom and went to the restroom to get the lint out of his hair which he didn't get a pass for and when he got back the teacher asked him where he went. He told her and was still talking to her upset when the helper teacher (my son is ADHD and had a lot of anger issues before high school so is in Special Ed but attends regular classes) tells him he needs to get with his group. He said ok and went to his group but before he could open the computer to start working, the helper teacher got after him for being slow to do that. He said 'get off my d_ck'. He said that is what the kids says to mean get off my back but he realized he shouldn't have said it. The helper teacher didn't hear what he said and when asked none of the kids would tell her but the teacher had heard and told her and also told her about his leaving class when he shouldn't have so the helper teacher told him she was going to write him up and she did. He was suppose to go to a club party after school but he just gave his food to another member of the club and came home because he was still so upset about what had happened in 5th period (there are 7 periods in the day). That was the day that my older son went to visit his half-brother's family and I was upset about that also. I thought about contacting the teachers but my son seemed to just want to let it drop. So on Nov. 4th the assistant principle talked to my son and gave him an all day in-school suspension that was to be done on the 7th. The 5th was a non school day and I tried to reach out to the staff and teacher to have a meeting. This was my son's first time in trouble since being in high school and he was upset that he got the all day in-school suspension and I felt that maybe he should have just gotten a warning especially when all this happened due to the teacher's comments in front of the class. I sent an email and I talked to the Special Ed teacher and the AP. The AP said he'd check into it more and call me back but he did not call me back and my son did the in-school suspension. I had told him that my son was worried about missing classes and how it would effect his grades but that didn't work well since my son has major 'Senioritis' and his grades were not good (but doesn't that mean he can't afford to miss? He said the teachers are to give all his work to the DMC teacher and he is to spend the day working on the assignments but few bother to give him the assignments and a lot of his work is not able to be done outside of class from what I understand. So all done and over we thought but my son told me this morning that the science teacher had told him that he missed a major test on the 7th and was failing the class. He said that she had told him that she would say Friday for him to make it up but then when he had checked with her about staying she told him that she never said that and so as far as he knew he was just going to get a zero on that test which would cause him to fail the class. I wrote an email this morning and requested that arrangements be made for him to take the test, that his schedule be changed so that he doesn't have that teacher the second semester (he had already talked to his councilor about that when this all happened in Nov. so this was a reminder). I waited to hear back but did not hear from anyone. Now my son is 18 so maybe that is why?? Anyway he told me when he got home from school that he was called to talk with the assistant principle and he is to take the test on Monday. I hope he does really well but it has to be better than a zero.
So that has been where my mind was all day today. My son isn't feeling well so I really hope that he is much better by Monday and we both TGIF.
Have a great evening and weekend.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    How horrible for that teacher and assistant to do that, and for it to get to the point of an in-school suspension AND the teacher threatening failure! That . . . is . . . just . . . plain . . . horrible. So sorry your son and you went thru that. I hope that things improve with a new science teacher the next semester. **SIGH** I went thru lots w/my son when he was in HS. ADHD. It seemed like I attended more school than HE did.

    HUGS and prayers.
    356 days ago
    The school staff’s behavior is unexceptionable. I understand you are handling it by email but I suggest you make an in person visit to the AP with your DS. Use the visit to show your DS how matters like this should be handled. Hopefully, he will receive an apology and validation that this type of behavior is unacceptable from teachers or anyone else. If he is able, he could apologize for what he said. He can also express how the situation made him feel and how it has stressed him. Maybe this would help him to put this behind him and let him get through the rest of the year without hard feelings.

    I hope you find a way to make school feel like a safe place again.
    357 days ago
    What a horrible thing for your son and you to go through. I am so sorry. You are such a good advocate for your son!
    357 days ago
    As a special educator, retired, it always pisses me off when I read this type of story. For some reason, those who are supposed to be the adults in the room, are bigger bullies than the students. They have all the power and set the kids up to fail. I get it that teaching is a very difficult profession, but what I don't get is if you don't like kids, why are you there? Get another job! The regular ed teachers (mostly) won't go out of their way to make sure the kids get what they need when they are resourced or are in ISS. The don't want to modify lessons/tests and rarely do. They make excuses why they can't attend IEP meetings. Give the parents and advocates a hard time when they stand up for the kid.

    Good luck to DS on Monday! Sure hope he nails the test. Sorry for the rant. emoticon

    Have a great weekend. emoticon emoticon
    357 days ago
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