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Kinda Mad and Feeling Guilty About It

Thursday, April 16, 2020

Not much time to spend on this blog! I have a large project due for one of my classes and I should be working on that.

I just feel frustrated and need to say so! For the past couple of years, I've had a lot of circumstances that have impacted my lifestyle, and as a result, have gained back about 15 pounds. I wasn't working out much and wasn't tracking my food or trying to eat healthy, so this was understandable and I wasn't mad about it. I knew why it happened, and I thought I knew what I needed to do about it.

So, for the past 3 months, I have been tracking and keeping my calories in the weight loss range. I've also greatly stepped up my fitness, doing circuit training or riding the stationary bike six days each week. (These are among the only things I can do until I have my hip surgery in November.) I've been trying hard and not slacking or cheating very much. And yet, after an initial loss of 5 pounds, 3 of them are back and I can't seem to lose anything more. Instead, I'm moving in the wrong direction.

I'm very frustrated right now, and I also feel guilty even worrying about my weight when people are fighting for their lives and struggling to survive economically. I know I'm very blessed, and it's my job to share help and hope with people, so I try very hard to stay positive. But darn it, this makes me mad! I don't like gaining, but when I'm not working out and eating badly it at least makes sense. But now that I'm doing the "right" things, it's pretty discouraging to be getting heavier instead of lighter.

That is all.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Well if you ever needed proof that stress could keep you heavy - this is it. Not just the expected stress of your job, which demands a lot of sensitivity for a whole congregation, not just the expected stress of your university work - which you knew would be demanding, not just the stress of doing all this while you tackle new technology and give up the human contact we all of us need, but the stress of Not Knowing. Who knows when things will open up? Who knows how? Who knows what other difficult things we are awaiting. Who knows how we will EVER pay for it all. Who knows?

    Not me
    Not you either

    So yes. you've got a nice little cushion of flesh put on - an ancient reaction our cave-man ancestors had too, that allowed them to get over times of scarcity. You aren't giving in to it - the weight will come off - but you are not a calculator - you are a human. You are His creation too - and be absolutely sure that He has something good planned for you. Never doubt it.

    big hugs
    much love
    your friend
    193 days ago
    I hear ya! Same here.
    It's frustrating for sure.
    195 days ago
    197 days ago
    Maybe more water, more sleep, more protein, less stress. emoticon
    197 days ago
    Your body is an amazing thing :) and so frustrating too... plateaus and rises try our patience to the max..

    My offering of help is drink more water, one glass each hour you are awake for three days and see if this has any effect. Water is so important to our bodies :)

    Hope it makes a difference for you too :)
    197 days ago
  • HOLLYM48
    I understand exactly what you are saying and where you are at. I have gained probably about 12 lbs from my lowest weight and it doesn't seem to matter how little I eat or how much I exercise. I just keep on doing my best, knowing that it does help my body regardless. If I lose those extra pounds, good, but if I don't, well then I will try to keep on eating healthy, walking, getting in good sleep and be comfortable where I am.
    You are beautiful no matter whether you lose the extra lbs or not!
    Have a lovely evening!
    197 days ago
    Hang in there,maybe switch something up if possible. I feel for you, it happens to us all.
    197 days ago
    It's very frustrating, but you will get through this.
    197 days ago
  • LORI-K
    I understand! We have all been there, are there, or will be there. It’s part of the journey. Ups and downs. But you are doing your health justice by continuing to exercise and eat well, whether the scale reflects it or not. You know it’s like an accordion, and things will eventually catch up to your efforts.
    Hang in there.
    Also, your feelings are your feelings and valid in every way. Don’t compare your frustrations to those that “may have it worse”. (I do understand the sentiment, but it really is all relative?).
    197 days ago
    How's your sleep and stress levels? Those two factors can play into weight gain as well. Sometimes food and exercise is not enough or the food types, proportions (fats, carbs, protein) needs to be tweaked.

    Carrying excess weight can impact our health and well-being. Don't feel guilty about your desire to shed some excess pounds.


    How do you feel physically?
    197 days ago
    I am feeling you. Same for me. Just be consistent. If you figure it out let me know. Oh hey. It is probably stress hormones. Ya think?
    197 days ago
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