Having "It" Together
Saturday, February 27, 2021
In my 20's, I was one of those that wished I had the wisdom of someone much older--they seemed to have it all together. Now I think that people at my age, 60's, just cover it up better. OR they have learned to accept their foibles better.
A four-step process for becoming my best me:
1) Observe self-destructive behavior and listen to others' observations
2) Let go of self-destructive thoughts by understanding where they originally come from
3) Start replacing thoughts and behaviors to teach the brain another route
4) Live in the truth of who I am and love that truth
Throughout my life, one lesson leads to another. Earlier last year I realized one of my negative thoughts was about "never being satisfied." That state of being dissatisfied wiped out a lot of joy--but then once I named it and could observe being dissatisfied hovering over me, I could tame it. After working on this for over a year, I am aware that this mentality will want to surface again, and I have the tools to stop that negative thought. Currently, the temptation is to be dissatisfied with my current weight. It is what it is and I am doing what I am able to do.
Now another one has emerged and I am going to treat it just like I did with being dissatisfied. I believe this thought is common among youngest, but we don't have the sole ownership. This one is the self-talk of "I am incompetent." What an eye opener, that has been trying to surface for a long time. And I would constantly reinforce that notion any time someone tried to teach me something. Ultimately, I have come to the conclusion that I don't want to be responsible. If I say I am incompetent, then I don't have to be in the driver's seat. This leaves me with choices. I can allow my self time to learn and accept responsibility for carrying through. I can also give myself permission to say, no. I don't have to keep proving to myself whether I am competent or incompetent. Just do what I do to the best of my ability and enjoy learning and growing and loving.
In writing this, I am owning it. That feels good!