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  • v ON_A_DIET
    Thank you for stopping by my blog!

    Aren't the shredded carrots too small for soup? They are smaller than diced.

    Thank you for the tips!

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    8 days ago
  • v SHARON10002
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    Aloe there and Happy Friday! Here we are, at the end of another week. I don't know about you, but this week literally flew by lickety-split! The weekend's coming - so let's get the good thymes rolling - shall we? I hope thistle give you a few giggles. . .

    What kind of stockings do women gardeners wear?
    Garden hose.

    It's a little gnome fact that almost all garden gnomes have red hats.

    My husband is an Earth sign and I am a Water sign. Together we make mud.

    My fear of roses is a thorny issue. I'm not sure what it stems from, but I'm stuck with it.

    How much room should you give fungi to grow?
    As mushroom as possible.

    Yesterday, I got escorted out of the Farmer's Market for disturbing the peas.

    The raisin wined about how he would never achieve grapeness.

    Wishing you nothing but good chives this weekend!
    10 days ago
  • v SHARON10002
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    It's the end of another week. . . Happy Friday! I have been trying to resolve some computer issues with the assistance of a computer tech. So I thought I'd post a few giggles about computers.

    The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.
    It was an Apple with limited memory, and with just one byte - everything crashed.

    A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

    Failure is not an option. It comes bundled in with all computer software.

    I changed my password to "incorrect" so anytime I forget it, my computer tells me
    "Your password is incorrect."

    Notice on bulletin board in the office lunch room:
    Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will hunt you down, and make you pay - You have my Word!

    The inventor of the autocorrect function recently died. May he rest in peas.

    The job application asked, "How good are you at Powerpoint?"
    My response: "I Excel at it!"

    Enjoy your weekend!
    17 days ago
  • v SHARON10002
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    It's Friday once again, and time to get our check-up from the neck up so we can be ready to enjoy our weekend! I think you'll find that these jokes will be just what the doctor ordered to tickle your funny bone because they're really quite humerus.

    For those of you who are uncertain of the meanings of medical terms, I thought I'd provide a few I've managed to find and decipher for you.

    "Medical Terms for Dummies"

    Artery - the study of fine paintings

    Bacteria - the back door to the cafeteria

    Catscan - searching for the missing kitty

    Cauterize - managed to made eye contact with the nurse

    Enema - Not a friend

    Fester - quicker than someone else

    Fibula - a small white lie

    Nitrates - Rates of pay for working the night shift; normally more than the day rates

    Outpatient - a person who has fainted

    Urine - the opposite of "You're out!"

    Vitamin - What you do when friends stop by for a visit

    I hope these haven't been so upsetting that they've made you nauseous.
    If so, lay down, take two aspirin, and call your doctor in the morning.

    Enjoy your weekend!
    24 days ago
  • v SHARON10002
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    Happy Friday! Lettuce celebrate making it through another week! Time fries when you're having fun! Here are a few giggles to put you in the right mood to start off your weekend.

    Apparently you can't use beefstew as a password. It's not stroganoff.

    If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock. Now that's humerus!

    Some guy just threw milk and cheese at me. How Dairy!

    Today's Tip: Don't be afraid to take whisks, and you'll rise to the top, to be the cream of the crop.

    Until we meat again next week - cake it easy.
    Thanks for stopping by! I hope you have an egg-cellent weekend!
    31 days ago
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