Wednesday, February 24, 2010

I haven't been working out much for the last two weeks. I am letting the stress of what I see around me get to me. I eat when I get to feeling like things are overwhelming and I have been doing a lot of it. I crave sugar and haven't cut it down or out of my eating plan like I should so no matter how consistent I have been with my workouts the last month and a half, the scale is not moving anymore. I can tell I am toning up but not dropping this excess weight at all. I am trying to remain positive but everything that is going on in my life is seeming to be too much. I want to relocate to a different part of the country but feel like I am being selfish. There are things going on within my family that I believe require me to stay here but I am miserable. I am holding on to a very toxic non commited relationship. My self esteem has improved but is nowhere near where it should be. I am not employed at the moment. I just feel very basic and less than........I barely leave my house so my social life is basically non existent. I have wasted a lot of time that is not mine to waste. I don't know how much time I have left on this earth and I definitely don't want to leave here with a bunch of regrets and what ifs. I don't feel like I have any control over anything in my life and I am attempting to focus on my weight and it's making me frustrated that I am not disciplined enough to control that. I just want things to change..........
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You are worthy. Never forget that. You are worthy of love and respect. Treat yourself well. Stick your chin out, throw your shoulders back, and say it firmly: "I am worthy."

    So often we forget this and treat others better than we treat ourselves. We let ourselves get dragged down by the pettiness around us. We stick with relationships we should leave. We eat things we wouldn't feed our pets because we forget that we are worth the effort to be better.

    You can do this. You can make your life into the one you want to lead.
    4131 days ago
  • CWYNN01
    Sweetie, I don't know how old you are but you already know you are in an unhealthy relationship.. What type of example are you setting for your 3 kids if you stay in a TOXIC relationship!!! You have to put yourself first & not that MAN!!! I understand you don't have a job but that doesn't mean you have to stay in a relationship.

    I understand you don't want to stay where you are at currently but until you can get on your feet you have to do what's best for you & your kids at the present time. Start searching for jobs in other areas maybe outside of your city & you can move there until you can relocate. You can relocate & step out on your own b/c I did it with 2 kids. I moved to Florida from TN with no family, just me & my 2 boys!! Here it is nearly 6 years later & it was the BEST MOVE OF MY LIFE!!! I left my toxic relationship in TN!!!

    So start loving yourself & let that relationship go!! If you just complain about it & do nothing about it then it does no good to keep on tormenting yourself by talking about it.. You have to take ACTION!!Lean on God & he will see you thru!! emoticon
    4131 days ago
    This blog really hit me where it hurts because I felt like this a couple of months ago. The only difference between you and I the guy I was dating ended up betraying me in the worst way possible. I was forced out of the non-committed, non-relationship as he told me!!! Now that I look back at it I am better now that he is not apart of my life. Now you have to make some decisions about what is going on. You are worth so much more than what you are feeling right now. Dig down deep and put you(U),did I say U-YES U first. Take time to look in the mirror and tell that smart, beautiful,happy woman that you love her. Take it one day at a time and you are right no day is promised and especially not tomorrow. Find a way to have a social life and whether you realize it or not but spark people is somewhat of a social arena. I have your back and you can do this but you have to start with you. Try believe me it has been 4 months now and I am feeling better, doing things and enjoying where I am now that I have moved on. I am not telling you to do what I did but you have to do you right now.
    Many blessing and I will keep a check on you.

    Blann emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    4131 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/24/2010 11:53:42 AM
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