Thursday, November 03, 2011
I have been challenged by a friend.
I have a hard time watching my food intake. I eat way more than I need to. I know this. Otherwise, I'm fairly healthy. I generally go to the gym 2-3 times a week. I was at the doctor yesterday. My blood pressure was 110 over 70 which they tell me is good. (No meds.) I can walk five miles with out thinking much about it. So, I feel like a fairly fit fat person. (Let's face it. At 225-230, I'm definitely not thin.)
I have no problem with exercise. Sure, let's go work up a sweat, work off some bad mojo. All good. My problem is with FOOD. I like to eat. I like to cook and I like to eat. I have a problem with food.
I try to pretend that it is healthy food. Hey, I'm a vegan, so what I'm eating can't be THAT bad for me, right. That doesn't even fly with ME.
I have been a vegan (no meat, no eggs, no dairy) since February 2007. (Almost 5 years.) I have faced much ridicule about this from my family and friends. Mostly good humored, some of it not so much. But I've preserved. Why? Because I am the very strong willed. I decided this is how it was going to be. My husband has asked me several times if I would (please) go back to being vegetarian (eating eggs and dairy, still no meat). No. Why? (Without getting into the whole-how-animals-are-treated-
thing) because I believe I am doing the right thing.
Today, we went out to lunch as a department to a buffet. Ugh! I did pretty good, but I ate french fries. Now, there is nothing wrong with french fries...in moderation. Like I said...I have a problem with food. I have a problem with moderation. I want to eat what I want to eat and how much I want to eat and still be thin. (Not going to happen.)
I was explaining what I had to a friend at work and she said "You are the only person who is in your way." (I knew that.) "You can be strong willed when it comes to eating a vegan diet, refusing food because it has animal products, but not healthy food?" Uh-oh. Never thought about it like that before.
So, I can use this as a paradigm shift...or I can continue the way I have been eating. But I can't use the "I don't have the will power..." excuse anymore. Because I know I do.
(By the way, for anyone who is curious and still reading...I am a taurus. Now I don't put a lot of belief in astrology, but I think bull headed is a good term for me at times.)