Another good day! so far.....
Sunday, September 06, 2015
14 days sober and medication changes have sort of started me feeling better. I was unable to sleep until 330am then got up and took another klonipin anti anxiety med that I take to sleep. 1st one did not work so took the second one at 330am. then got to sleep and slept until 11am. hubby came to wake me up. I needed to sleep that much. He was hungry and wanted to go out to eat like we usually do. I had 3 eggs scrambled with spinach and a side of black bean salsa heated over my eggs and a side of brocolli. my usual sunday morning breakfast.
Drinking was an activity that we did together. Drinking is something I have in common with my husband. WE would go out for drinks and have fun. Now I can't do that. i am finding that my desire has returned to go to the gym and start training again for my 10 k coming up in november 14th. I had a thigh injury after my may memorial day 5 k run. so that put me back and I was so depressed about that...that is when I started drinking again...
I had not drank from jan to may then drank a week then had a dry june then july came and I started drinking until after my last vacation. My new day one is August 24th.
I lose weight when I don't drink, I sleep better, I should not drink because of the medications that I take. Two of them have warning labels. Both my psych doctor and my GP don't want me to drink...they judge me when I fail which doesn't make me feel good, shameful. I wish that I could drink in moderation. I can for a few days then that turns into more and more...then I get carried away...and have black outs.
hubby is taking a nap. He did not sleep well. I have been snoring these days and keeping him up...he doesn't like wearing ear plugs but that muffles out the noise. We were going to go to a play but missed it started at 2 and we thought it started at 3 so we will see that next weekend. I am going to clean my bathroom floor because it needs it really badly. Hair spray and dirt don't mix well.
Then I am going to go to the NAMI (national association of the mentally ill) support group meeting at 6 pm. It is a free support group that meets 2 times a month. I guess I need some outside support since I have been making these medication changes, following doctors orders to do such.
And I am not seeing a therapist because i can't afford one.
So between these forums and support group and a couple of friends to help keep an eye on me along with hubby. I think I will be fine. I think hubby and I are going to go to a park and go hiking even though it is hot an humid.