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Cat, Cookies, and Corn

Friday, November 18, 2016

emoticon What is that I wonder........................
.......yawning I brush away whatever it is that is tickling my ear. (note:those dots happen because I nod off while I am typing this tale).

Merowww, MERROWWwww, something cold and wet against my neck, with a head butt under my chin brings me on full alert. Ohhhhh that's right I am now owned by a cat! I hurry and jump out of bed, ignoring the cramp in my leg, and turn on the light so I can answer Her Majesty's summons.

Miss Queenie, (of the dual personalities), is gracefully washing her face. Looking at the clock I see that it is 3:52 AM. "What can you possibly want at this time of night?" I ask in perfect human English.

"meowt," says Her Majesty, then goes to sit by the door.
"No," says I, taking on my best adult female stance.
"Meowno", ( I honestly did say it that way, but please understand I am walking and talking in my sleep).

She must have believed me because she went to the sink and waited to be served. "Meowater," I dump the perfectly good room temperature water,wash her dish and fill it with fresh water. As Mistress drinks her fill, I am standing against the counter dozing.

Suddenly the growling in my stomach jolts me awake . I'm hungry. It's now close to 4 AM and I'm hungry. I eat a cookie.

Mistress is calmly drying her whiskers. Yellow eyes gleaming she says, "meowt" and walks to the door.
"NO," I say firmly. I have decided it's easier for her to learn English than for me to learn Meow.
"Meowk", I win this round. Majesty with tail held high in that regal way she has goes to the litter pan to do her business. I eat another cookie........................
..........................................(sorry, I'm dozing as I write this).

When Queen is finished with her business at the pan, she quietly commands me to come scoop it out. Seriously! What cat does that? She wants it done MENOW! Of course I obey.

4:27 AM Back to bed we go. I settle in on my back and Her Majesty takes her place on my belly. Smiling, I can't help but be proud of myself because I know what comes next. Sure enough, begins the padding of the paws and up she tip toes to find her place across my heart and under my chin. I'm hoping the purring will lull me back to sleep.

No such luck.

Oh it's not Mistress cat that keeps me awake. She is sound asleep in her favorite position. It's those darn cookies, and Betty's corn! You may remember Betty from my Diary entry a while back the day I ate liver.

Dear Diary, Today I ate Liver! :) You and I both know I love
(scripta continua is the only way to describe that meal. It's all one necessary ingredient)!!!!!!

So I'm lying there thinking about eating cookies and Betty's corn, trying to go back to sleep.

My scattered thoughts go something like this. So far we've had corn chowder, chicken corn soup, baked corn.... I hope she makes something else soon... I'm glad she liked the spaghetti squash I made her. Can you imagine a 90 year old woman who never ate spaghetti squash. She always tells me my food needs more salt but she didn't say that about the squash, and she loved my sauce which I make from scratch with canned tomato puree. Is it really scratch if I use canned tomatoes? Well I can see it's useless to try to sleep when I'm so hungry, I may as well get up and finish those cookies.

I made coffee and ate the last three cookies. They were good for dunking because they were here a full week. I vowed I will not buy cookies again even if they are on sale, but I think I will hint to Betty that I really enjoy her corn dishes. "SIIIIIGH" I must write the cookies in my food journal emoticon and with that thought I will close this blog and return to serving my Queen. I hear her calling my name, Meoslave.

Have an amazing last day of the Fall Challenge! May God bless you as you step on the scale, (and in everything else too). C U Lighter!

To those who are participating with the "Inbetweeners" emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    1715 days ago
    We are all owned by our cats....well, at least the lucky among us are. emoticon emoticon
    1717 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1717 days ago
    Our little "girls" rule. Daylight savings is so hard on them
    1717 days ago
    LOL! I am giggling like a nut! Be careful, you don't want to do this every night for her majesty! But, alas! If you are like me, you will! Thanks for sharing!
    1717 days ago
  • LYNCHD05
    I have never been owned by a cat but I can see she is quite successful I her training of you so far. Well done Queeny!!!
    1717 days ago
    Your posts always makes me smile. Today's post makes me happy that I am a dog owner. No cat... although I do miss my mouser.... last week I finally got the last of the mice out and my pantry cleaned. When I had my Miss B Have... I never had a problem. Good luck on your training or should I say her training of you.
    1717 days ago
    Loved your blog! emoticon
    1717 days ago
    First, I congratulate you on rationing the cookies to last a week. Mine don't last that long so are on the "do not buy or bake" list. And, for being honest in your tracking. emoticon

    Secondly, you are setting a very, very dangerous precedent with Queenie. I've read that you have to say "no" at least 10 times for every time she gets a yes. Do you really want to be wakened in the middle of the night every night to provide fresh water and scoop out the litter box? She is working overtime to train you, LOL. It might be one of those things like when you giggle when a pup or kitten nips at you but when they are older and it's no longer funny, but painful, the habit is hard to break. There are some scarily intelligent cats and some dumber than door knobs. Your Miss Queenie sounds at the top of the intelligence scale. She picked her human well.
    1717 days ago
    Glad that you two are coming to agreement on how things will be. emoticon
    And yes, you're absolutely right about the "...smotheredinonionswithmashdpotat
    1717 days ago
    The joys of being owned. Love the post. Thank you for brightening the day.
    1717 days ago
  • no profile photo CD16257668
    Now that its cold my cats want to stay in until 3am. Then they demand to be let out to do important cat stuff mind you not at the same time. They must stagger their demands to go outside of course. Welcome to being owned by a cat.
    1717 days ago
    Love it !
    1717 days ago
    Lol Love your post
    1717 days ago
    The cat has occasionally slept curled up beside me on the bed but never on top of me. I prefer to keep her out entirely by closing the door and she's learned. When I was awake and hungry the other night I grabbed a Kashi granola bar - much more satisfying and fewer calories - and got right back to sleep.
    1717 days ago
    When I keep thinking of food instead of sleeping, I wish I had eaten that last snack I denied myself. Sometimes it is worth giving into temptation. emoticon
    1717 days ago
    Cute. Heehee.
    1717 days ago
    Best plan ahead for those late night / early morning snacks! emoticon
    1717 days ago
    I've been subscribed to your blog a while now, but the addition of the cat has made your entries even better. emoticon You brighten my day.
    1717 days ago
  • no profile photo CD16711123
    Thank you for the chuckles . . I don't have a cat right now, but have in the past . . my little pup owns me and my hubby . . pets, what joy they bring into our lives emoticon
    1717 days ago
  • TAMIP62
    LOL oh my, setting the tone early in the relationship... that cat KNEW who to pick. That was no random encounter, she was stalking you. hahhaa
    1717 days ago
  • TIPHI1228
    oh my goodness.. this was fantastic! I do not miss having pets hahahaha.. I do miss cookies but not as much as I miss the weight so you can keep buying what I don't!

    seriously this blog was great and honest and I smiled reading the whole thing.. and you *cough* tracked those cookies * cough* hahaha...

    It truly has been a fun challenge!

    Have a great day!
    1717 days ago
    My first kidney stone was a major pain that I didn't know how to identify. I had a pain pill from an injury that I saved and took it. I was able to fall asleep but about 15 minutes after I had drifted off our cat jumped from the window sill to my stomach which woke me up to stay. after taking a scalding bath I went to the student health clinic and waited there for the doctor who arrived hours later and then I got some relief. I still haven't forgiven the long deceased cat.
    1717 days ago
    What a fun blog! I hope you're not too tired today!
    1717 days ago
    Be careful of cats that sleep on tummies especially if your sinuses are plugged. Seriously, one night I woke up to the worst, and I mean the worst undesirable taste in my mouth. I slowly open my eyes to see Casper staring into my eyes , his love purr on his lips and a steady stream of kitty drool running from his mouth to mine! My tummy still churns when I think about it!
    1717 days ago
    Love the cat tales !! emoticon I often wake up at 3:00 am, because the cats get into their wrestling matches for the day's house championship. This scenario takes place all over the house, but Jeni shuts her door at night, so they get ready to rumble in my room. You might ask why I don't shut my door, but the food, water and cat box are all in my room so I really can't. I have to get up to referee the match, so that they don't wake up the entire household. That's why you see posts from me at 3:00 something am, even though I am on the West Coast and three hours behind many of you. For me, 3:00 am is pretty much the norm, not the exception. Have a great last day too !! I'm sure that you can use your time now to plan for the Winter Challenge !! See you on the threads !! Thank you for all that you do for the Challenge and the ROOKIE Team !! emoticon Take care and God bless, Deb emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1717 days ago
    As someone who lives with 3 cats (and a dog, the definite underling or perhaps I should say underdog) I am greatly enjoying your Queenie stories and sharing them with my husband who does speak cat. emoticon emoticon
    1717 days ago
    She is definitely training you :)
    1717 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1884311
    emoticon Still learning the meows I see. Aren't they fun?
    I love it when "His Majesty" sleeps on my heart too. Although he's big and doesn't pur very loud at all. He does pur, but not so you can hear it. I have to scratch his neck to know that he's purring. Not so with the other one. When he purs everyone in the house can hear it. emoticon
    Unfortunately, he doesn't pur quite as much as "His Majesty." They're both jealous of each other though. I guess that's what being brothers means.
    1717 days ago
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