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Day one activities with baby

Monday, February 18, 2019

So my son is one now and I have been really bad about just parking him in front of the TV. So I looked up a bunch of activities for baby, spent about 40$ at the dollar store and Walmart buying little games, flash cards and craft supplies. Tonight is night one (yeah hes still not sleeping at night) tried a few different activites. He mostly just wants to play with cookie sheets because the noises they make. Probably a drummer like his dad. I'm on chapter four of the spark book and I ended a "sort of" relationship tonight (online). It was making me feel bad. And I don't want to get stuck in something that makes me feel bad again. I started feeling he was hindering my progress and I started feeling like I wasnt "worth" conversation with, my attempts at getting to know him further were thwarted yet he would complain I am doing homework or reading too much like I was at his beck and call for attention. Why are these the men I attract? I'm starting to wonder if that's all there is. Like of course I'm busy, I'm a full time mom going to school. He even brought up he couldnt be the white knight I needed which is something I never even considered, mostly I just was looking for a friendship. Whatever. I stood up for myself and that's what counts. This journey is about me.
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