Wednesday, October 17, 2007

My spark email article today was just the thing I needed. It compared losing weight to driving in traffic - it may take a while to get to your destination, there may be starts, stops and detours but if you have a map of how to get to your destination, you will eventually get there.

Wow - patience is the lesson I need to keep re-learning.

I have been so frustrated that I haven't been able to get more cardio exercise in. A year ago I was doing endurance bicycling (hours at a time). I now have a problem knee, have had surgery and I still can't seem to get biking again. I've been going to PT and last week the assistant had me do an extra 15 minutes on the cardio machines. I was really jazzed by that and worked as hard as I could. By the time I was done my knee was completely swollen - both at the spot the surgeon removed a meniscus tear from as well as the other side of my knee that stays in pain. The therapist asked why I did so much. (Frustration there, your employee told me to and I thought she knew what she was doing.) I did a very weak 1/2 hour on the road bike on Sunday. It did not elevate my heart rate but I was so very happy to be moving again. Yesterday, the therapist said I should not be doing any of that until I had proper clearance from my Dr.. She also does not want me to see the Dr. until after I have a re-evaluation this week. The dr. next door to my office (also a ortho doc told me "What you need to do is push aways" - cute)

I've been so frustrated. If I lose weight, my knee will hurt less (I'm told). Exercise (which I know makes me feel better) will help me loss weight faster. But I am having trouble exercising (I'm told) because of my weight.

The article I mentioned above is helping me get new perspective. I can lose the weight gradually by monitoring my food intake. I don't need to be the perfectionist who manages to burn exactly the planned numbers of calories on my spark people plan. I can stay as active as I can be given the painful knee. I am still getting strength training in 3 days a week. The best thing of all is I actually WANT to exercise. Never in my almost 53 years would I ever have thought that would happen.

Patience and doing "good enough" is so hard for me. I always have been one to set a goal and work hard at reaching it my perfectly following my plans. When I was growing up I got the clear message that I need to do my best at all times and my best better be perfect. That is probably been why in the past a diet slip has been diet slide or diet end.

Following the analogy of the weight loss journey to a car trip, I see being frustrated or trying to exercise despite the pain is not going to make the knee heal faster or me to lose the weight faster. I WILL get to my destination in the time it takes to get there doing the best job I can as an imperfect human who may not always perfectly follow my plan.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    As we get older our bones become more fragile too.. you want to do everything you can right now to take care of that knee.. it has to be your first priority. The exercise can come later.. you are going to need that knee for the rest of your life and what you do with it now will determine what kind of life you are going to lead 10 years from now. So patience really is you friend right now.. hard as it may be, go with it.
    Hugs to you,
    5035 days ago
    Your blog entry really hit home with me tonight. I was busy from the time I got up this morning until about an hour ago. I work for myself and consequently end up wearing a bunch of different hats each day. Today was frustrating. I didn't spend any time this morning organizing my thoughts, planning my daily meals or focusing on my personal goals. Consequently, I am at the end of a long day not feeling very good about what I ate. Like you said, PATIENCE! There are going to be days like this and I need to back off and learn how to deal with them. Like you, I am one of those "all-or-nothing" types. This is something I am trying to unlearn.

    Don't get discouraged with the PT. All bodies heal at their own pace. You WILL get there. I admire your tenacity and appreciate your sharing!
    5036 days ago
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