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KITTYHAWK1949's Blogs

not just jokes day 25
Monday, March 23, 2020      6 comments

Ok. I haven't commented much on life here lately as I haven't been doing much positive or in other words, I have been overeating and not exercising. Here is an update on the last couple of weeks that I recently shared with my family followed b... Read more
just jokes day 25
Sunday, March 22, 2020      7 comments

What do you give a deer with an upset stomach? Elkaseltzer. What do you do with an elephant with three balls? Walk him and pitch to the rhino. How do you make an elephant fly? First, you start with a 48-inch zipper... Tha... Read more
just jokes day 24
Saturday, March 21, 2020      4 comments

How do you get an elephant out of the theater? You can't. It's in their blood. What do you get when you cross a fly with an elephant? A zipper that never forgets. Can an elephant jump higher than a lamppost? Yes. Lampposts c... Read more
just jokes day 23
Friday, March 20, 2020      7 comments

Never say anything bad about a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. By then he's a mile away, you've got his shoes, and you can say whatever you want to. Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. Why is an eleph... Read more
just jokes day 22
Thursday, March 19, 2020      7 comments

If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat? The only reason I'd take up jogging is so I could hear heavy breathing again. I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people who annoy me. If you're goin... Read more
just jokes day 21
Wednesday, March 18, 2020      4 comments

Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant. Some days you're the bug, some days you're the windshield. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. It's not the pace of life that concerns me, it's t... Read more
just jokes day 20
Tuesday, March 17, 2020      6 comments

Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo. Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive. All the toilet seats were stolen from police headquarters. The police... Read more
just jokes day 19
Monday, March 16, 2020      5 comments

Why is it called a building when it has already been built? Politicians and diapers should both be changed regularly---and for the same reason. I like your approach...let's see your departure. God grant me the senility to forget t... Read more
just jokes day 18
Sunday, March 15, 2020      8 comments

Where do you find a no-legged dog? Right where you left him. Why is it great to be a test tube baby? You get a womb with a view. Did you hear that archeologists just recently identified the cause of the Dark Ages? It was most ... Read more
just jokes day 17
Saturday, March 14, 2020      3 comments

Where does satisfaction come from? A satisfactory. What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe with a Border collie? Melancholy babies, Why can't a woman ask her brother for help? Because he can't be a brother and assist her t... Read more
just jokes day 16
Friday, March 13, 2020      7 comments

Did you hear about the new restaurant that opened in India? It's a New Delhicatessen. How do you keep a bagel from getting away? Put lox on it! What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved. What's a... Read more
just jokes day 15
Thursday, March 12, 2020      3 comments

Did you hear about the home brewer who entered his first brewing contest? * The report he got back read: "Dear Sir, your horse has diabetes." If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is definitely not for you. if H2O is on the insid... Read more
just jokes day 14
Wednesday, March 11, 2020      7 comments

Did you hear Willie Nelson got hit by a car? He was playing on the road again. Why do bicycles fall over? Because they are two-tired. Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring? He decided to stick it out for ... Read more
just jokes day 13
Tuesday, March 10, 2020      8 comments

What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones. What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Nacho cheese. What did one hot dog say to another? Hi, Frank. What do you get when you pour boiling water down a r... Read more
just jokes day 12
Monday, March 09, 2020      4 comments

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul to Santa. How did the mouse feel after the cat chased it through a screen door? Strained. What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? Dam. What do ... Read more

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